For The Sake Of My Mental Health: It's Over!

It’s over, finally. I did what I have been avoiding for a long time. I cut ties with my Ex. It was time. As much as I wanted to be friends, it was never going to happen. As long as HWSNBN is in the picture, being friends won't work, not now, not ever. I mean, really, how can two people be friends when the thing that destroyed them is there as a constant reminder of the hurt, lies, betrayal, hate, and all the rest of it?

So, I composed myself, and made the call. I asked her how we could be friends when I can never go to her home and share a meal with her at her table, or just hang out and watch a movie, etc. She responded by telling me that she was living in a fantasy world, she didn't know how it would work, and that I was right. I asked her where she thought she's going to go with this whole fantasy life and how she can be so naive, but I already knew the answer to my own question. Fact is, she has always wanted what she wants, when she wants, so I didn't expect much more from her. In the end, I told her: Being friends isn't going to work, so I have to let you go. Be happy in your life, take care of yourself, and if one day you decide to do the right thing, so be it. Until then, it’s good-bye.

I feel so sad & empty today (actually, I feel kind of sick, to tell you the truth) because I have fought for this friendship for two years, not knowing I was being lied to (read my older posts for the back story) the whole time, and now I had to be the one to do the right thing. Oh well, I guess it’s for me & my mental health, and I hope it will help her figure things out for herself. This really was the only way out for both of us. I don’t want to hurt her, and I don’t want to be hurt again. I will be sad, and I will miss her, but maybe, just maybe, some good will come from all of this.

JB