Customer of the Week: Multiple Cake Guy

I started work last Sunday -- Father's Day -- at 5:30am. For three hours, I flat iced and decorated cakes. By the time we actually opened for business, my arm was killing me and I couldn't see straight anymore. I really needed a break, but I still had some cakes to finish up, so Drey (my co-worker) went to greet our first customer of the day.

Drey: Hi, can I help you?

MCG: I need a birthday cake?

Drey: Alright, what kind?

MCG: I just need a birthday cake?

Drey: Yes, but what kind of cake would you like?

MCG: Just a birthday cake.

Me: (some people are so dense) Sir, (walking up to the counter) what size of cake do you need?

MCG: Umm...

Me: Would you like a white cake or a chocolate cake?

MCG: Umm...

Me: (pointing to a quarter slab in the display case) Will this do?

MCG: Yes, OK.

Me: (pulling out the cake from the display case) What would you like written on it?

MCG: "Happy birthday to my beloved son, on this day, on your birthday."

Me: (O... K...) What about his name?

MCG: It's Muhammad.

Me: (handing the cake to Drey so she could finish serving the guy) Alright, she's going to take care of that for you.

MCG: Thank you.

When the guy left with his cake, Drey and I had a good laugh at the rather redundant birthday message that he wanted written on it. There's a first time for everything, I guess, including a guy who comes back 30 minutes later for yet another birthday cake.

MCG: (approaching the counter with a young girl) Hi, I'm back.

Me: Was there a problem with the cake, sir?

MCG: No, I need a another one.

Me: (hmm) Oh?

MCG: (picking up a Boston fruit cake from the service counter out front) I need you to write something on this.

Me: I'm sorry, sir, but I can't write directly on a cake with fruit piled on top.

Young girl: Yeah, they can't write on fruit, Dad.

BCG: Well, they can write on something. A piece of cake or chocolate...

Me: (trying not to laugh) Sir, we can't write on a piece of cake to put on a cake.

Young girl: Yeah, Dad, they can't put cake on a cake.

Me: (ha ha, thanks for your two cents, kid) I can write on a cookie.

MCG: What kind of cookie?

Me: (picking one up and showing it to him) It's a wafer cookie.

MCG: There is not enough room to write on that.

Me: (of course not...) Sir, exactly what do you want me to write on it?

MCG: The same thing as the last cake, but to my daughter. Her name is Amira.

Me: (maybe if I had tiny mouse hands) The best I can do is write "Happy Birthday, Amira" on it.

MCG: OK, that's fine.

Again, I have Drey prepare the cake for him and send him on his way, only to see him return a half hour later with the same daughter and an even younger one.

Me: (looking wide eyed at Drey who turned away giggling)

MCG: We need another cake.

Me: (OK, seriously, how many kids does this guy have born on the same day & why couldn't he just order all of the cakes at once?) Alright, what kind would you like this time?

MCG: I want a cheesecake, but not for a birthday cake. I have another daughter at home and she can't eat anything with gelatin on it.

Me: (then you should have picked another cake) I'm sorry, but the fruit on the cheesecake is covered in gelatin.

MCG: Oh... right. Umm... Can you make me one now without any?

Me: (yeah, let me get my magic wand & I'll make one appear out of thin air for you) Sir, I can't make you a cheesecake right this moment. It's going to take at least 30 minutes.

MCG: OK, how about 45 minutes or an hour?

Me: Sure. What kind of fruit would you like on it?

MCG: Can you put mangos, bananas and cherries?

Me: I can put bananas, but not the other two.

MCG: What about tangerines & strawberries?

Me: Yes, I can do that.

MCG: OK, I will come back.

An hour later, the guy comes back and I present him with the cheesecake. He was so happy, he could not stop praising us.

MCG: It's beautiful. Thank you. You are the best, ladies. Thank you for helping me. Thank you. It looks beautiful. Thank you.

Me: (ha ha, he's too much) My pleasure, sir. Enjoy your day.

Two hours and one hundred bucks later, the guy finally had all of the cakes he needed. I thought it would be nice if his wife or maybe one of his kids came in to buy him a Father's Day cake, but that never happened. Maybe they made him one, I don't know. He certainly deserved a cake for making sure his kids were happy on a day when they should have been showing their appreciation for him.

JB