Food for Thought: Grace

Hi Everyone,

For today’s post, I want to share some thoughts about grace, which has been on my mind a lot lately.

How do you show someone grace when you don't think it's deserved? 

How do you continue to show someone grace when they clearly don't appreciate it? 

Why do so many people, especially women, feel guilty about showing themselves grace? 

I'll be honest, I struggle with grace. In situations where I could be showing grace, I’m usually reacting with frustration and annoyance. At the same time, I've been shown grace repeatedly over the years when I didn't particularity deserve it (and I still often feel undeserving), but clearly needed it from someone. So, you see how grace is a rather tricky conundrum for me to sort out. 

Recently, though, I came across a Queenism (see end of post for more info)*** that touches on grace, and I knew it was something that I wanted to pass along. 

 

 

This really spoke to me because women almost never put themselves first, often saying “yes” to someone or something out of guilt when they would much rather be saying “no” – which, by the way, would be showing themselves grace. 

Therefore, practicing grace does not mean ignoring your personal boundaries. Rather, it is more than okay to take time out for yourself, to put yourself first, to treat yourself with kindness, to practice self-compassion. Allowing for the time and space you need to take a step back, especially for the sake of your mental health, is one of the greatest expressions of grace you can show yourself.

 

Until next time, 

Eddy 

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*** Lifelong friends, Kathy Kinney (American actress, voice actress, and comedian) and Cindy Ratzlaff (personal speaker and award winning marketing & branding professional), originally began writing and creating Queenisms™ -- small doses of daily inspiration -- for themselves. When they started sharing Queenisms™ on their Facebook page, women everywhere responded with messages of thanks and gratitude. Over 10 years later, Kathy and Cindy, co-authors of Queen of Your Own Life: The Grown Up Woman's Guide to Claiming Happiness and Getting the Life You Deserve and Queenisms: 101 Jolts of Inspiration, continue to inspire women everywhere, one Queenism at a time. 

Image Credit: From QueenofOwnLife on Pinterest

Food for Thought: How to Live to Be 100+

Hello Everyone,

How's the new year going so far?

Recently, I saw a news story about the oldest living person. Her name is Kane Tanaka and she just celebrated her 119th birthday on January 2nd. Below is a photo of her taken in 1923 at the young age of 20. Beautiful, isn't she?

Kane has been living in a nursing home in Higashi-ku, Fukuoka, Japan since September 2018 and she still gets around on her own two feet, taking short walks in the hallways. Pretty amazing! 

Can you imagine living as long as she has?

I got to thinking about this and was reminded about geographic regions known as Blue Zones, which are home to some of the world’s oldest people.

The term "Blue Zone" was first used by Dan Buettner, a National Geographic Fellow and multiple New York Times bestselling author, who was studying areas of the world where people are living much longer than the average person. While doing their research, Buettner and his colleagues drew blue circles around these regions on map, hence Blue Zones.

Originally, there are five known Blue Zones:

• Icaria, Greece
  
• Ogliastra, Sardinia, Italy
• Okinawa, Japan
• Nicoya Peninsula, Costa Rica
• Loma Linda, California, USA

Buettner discusses these area in his book, The Blue Zones, published in 2008, but there could very well be more unidentified Blue Zones areas in the world waiting to be discovered.

So, why those five regions?

Studies of these areas have found that they contain incredibly high rates of people who live over 90 and 100 years of age, with genetics accounting for 20–30% of longevity. This means that environmental factors, including diet and lifestyle, play a significant role in determining one's lifespan. 

In fact, it was discovered that all blue zones areas share nine specific lifestyle habits referred to as the Power 9®. These habits are:

1. Move naturally - no crazy exercise routines, just moving without thinking

2. Purpose - i.e have a life purpose

3. Down shift - practicing ways to de-stress

4. 80% rule - stop eating when you're 80% full

5. Plant slant - eat a 95% plant-based diet

6. Wine at 5 - drink alcohol moderately, one to two glasses of red wine per day

7. Belong - i.e. to some sort of faith-based community

8. Loved ones first - i.e. investing time and love into family first

9. Right tribe - associate with people who support healthy behaviors/lifestyles

As I consider those nine habits, some are certainly easier for me to put into practice, while others... I honestly don't know if I can pull them off. I just know that simple is better as I get older. I don't have patience for fussing about; it's too exhausting. I want to live better, and -- barring any unforeseeable circumstances -- that will translate to living longer.

So, as I bring this post to an end, I'd like to share this Ted-Ed video where Dan Buettner talks about How to live to be 100+.

 

Let me know your thoughts by leaving a comment.

All the best for 2022.

Until next time, 

Eddy

Food for Thought: The Secret to Happiness

Hello All,

It's hard to believe that close to nine months have passed since beloved game show host and television personality, Alex Trebek, passed away. For those who grew up watching "Jeopardy!" each night, it's definitely strange not to see him hosting. The guest hosts have been holding their own, but it's just not the same show without Alex. Many believe that "Jeopardy!"champion, Ken Jennings, is the best choice to take over hosting, but it looks like executive producer, Mike Richards, will likely get the job. We shall see.

In the meantime, I wanted to share a quote from Alex Trebek about happiness. 

Keeping our spirits up has been difficult since our world got turned upside down and life became extra stressful, so it's important to take a minute to just breath... to appreciate what we have, to be thankful and grateful.

Until next time,

Eddy

What is Christmas?

Hello All,

With the unprecedented year we've all had, I wanted to post a special message this Christmas that we can all reflect on and take to heart. I think the following quote by Agnes M. Pharo says it all.

 

 

Merry Christmas to everyone, everywhere.

 

Until next time,

- Eddy 🎄

Food for Thought: Understanding Life

Hello Everyone,

It's been a couple of months since my last post, and even longer since life was "normal" for all of us. How do we make sense of life in times like these? Seems all we can do is keep on keeping on, hence the quote I'm sharing today.

 

 

In other words, hindsight is 20/20. Life is ever changing, moving, evolving... so all you can do is live, reflect, learn - repeat. There's no such thing as understanding your life if you haven't lived it, and living is a day by day process.

Therefore, you make sense of your life one day at a time -- and take comfort in the fact that no one has it all figured out! 😄

Until next time,

Eddy

A Christmas Message

Hello Everyone,

With this being the last Christmas of this decade, I wanted to take a moment to wish you all joy and peace, and to share something to think about.

Merry Christmas to all.

Until next time,
Eddy 🎄

Food for Thought: Grief and Grieving

Hi Everyone,

It's been a very sad time as of late. Sleep is hard to come by and I am exhausted. I'm not up for writing much more, so I'll share something to think about and be on my way.

Until next time,
Eddy

Food for Thought: Priority vs Option

Hi Everyone,

I'm sharing some food for though today that I think is very powerful. I don't know about all of you, but the older I get, the less patience I have for people who see nothing wrong with coming around only when they need something... when it suits them... when they have no one else. In fact, I consciously make a point of staying away from people who treat me this way, and that is why the following quote by Mark Twain really struck a chord with me.

Why should I go out of my way to be there for people, to do things for people, who treat me like an option? Nope, I'm done with that crap!

Relationships are about give and take, so don't do all the giving, and don't do all the taking.

I deserve better, just as you deserve better if you often find yourself in the "option" position of a relationship. Stick with people who also take time out to make you a "priority" because they will be there for you through the good, the bad, the whatever, just as you will be there for them. They won't only come around when they have no other option.


Until next time,

Eddy

Food for Thought: A Mother's Love for Her Child

Hi Everyone,

I know Mother's Day isn't until the weekend, but I've been super busy lately, so I'm posting something while I have the chance.

The following quote about a mother's love for her child comes from best selling author, Agatha Christie.

To all you mom's out there, I salute you!


Until next time,

Eddy

Food for Thought: "Everybody Hurts" by R.E.M.

Hi All,

I'm not sure how to start this post, so forgive me if it gets long winded or sounds like I am preaching by the time I am done....

If you haven't heard already, celebrity chef Anthony Bourdain is dead. The cause of death was suicide, this news coming just days after fashion designer Kate Spade was found dead, her death also ruled suicide. I can't even begin to imagine the pain they were in and how long they must have been suffering in silence.

You might be thinking, why does this matter to me and why should it matter to you? Well, it's quite simple, really. There are a lot of people out there suffering in silence -- people you know, people you don't know, maybe even you. In fact, a few weeks ago, the co-worker of a family member took her own life. I didn't know this person, but someone close to me did.

So, you see, just because we never knew Anthony or Kate personally, it doesn't mean that we shouldn't care. What we should be doing is opening up our eyes to those around us and letting people know that they are not alone. This is why I am sharing the video "Everybody Hurts" by R.E.M. I've also included the lyrics below. I just want to offer some hope in whatever small way I can, and the message in this song expresses what I want to convey.

Everybody Hurts

R.E.M.

When your day is long
And the night
The night is yours alone
When you're sure you've had enough
Of this life
Well hang on
Don't let yourself go
'Cause everybody cries
And everybody hurts sometimes

Sometimes everything is wrong
Now it's time to sing along
When your day is night alone (hold on)
(Hold on) if you feel like letting go (hold on)
If you think you've had too much
Of this life
Well, hang on

'Cause everybody hurts
Take comfort in your friends
Everybody hurts
Don't throw your hand
Oh, no
Don't throw your hand
If you feel like you're alone

No, no, no, you're not alone
If you're on your own
In this life
The days and nights are long
When you think you've had too much
Of this life
To hang on

Well, everybody hurts sometimes
Everybody cries
And everybody hurts sometimes
And everybody hurts sometimes
So, hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on

Everybody hurts

You are not alone

Songwriters: Bill Berry / Michael Stipe / Peter Buck / Michael Mills
Everybody Hurts lyrics © Warner/Chappell Music, Inc, Universal Music Publishing Group

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Need help/want to talk?

National Suicide Prevention Service in Canada: 1-833-456-4566 | Text 45645

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline in the United States: 1-800-273-8255

International: YourLifeCounts
 
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"Don't let yourself go... you are not alone... hold on...."

💗 Eddy

Food for Thought: Grief is Just Love...

Hello Everyone,

Since my earlier post last Friday, JB and I have had a bunch of sad news come our way. The saddest news of all being that a very dear cousin of ours passed away. Cancer... I hate that disease.

Our cousin was something else. Husband, father, brother, friend... story teller. Truly, he could talk and talk and talk! I have no idea how he could remember so far back into his childhood with such clarity. I'm lucky if recall what I ate last night for dinner. I'm going to miss his stories. I'll miss his phone calls -- "Hey, what you doin'?" -- every month. He lived out west, so we didn't see each other much. I think the last time we got together in person was over five years ago. Time goes fast when you're busy living your life, but he's done living now -- at least on this earthly plane. No doubt he's chatting up a storm with his parents, my dad, and other family members who've crossed over. Yep, they're having a reunion party, while the rest of us are grieving. And so it goes....

What is grief? I came across something by a woman named Jamie Anderson that really resonated with me and I want to share it with all of you.

"Grief is just love with no place to go." Well said, Jamie, well said.


Goodbye, cousin. Thanks for the memories. We'll miss you.

- Eddy & JB

Food for Thought: You're Different

Hello All,

Happy New Year --- and I sure as heck hope it is for all us. Buh-bye 2016!!

My first post for this year is a quote by a woman named Alfa. As someone who's never been much of a follower, I thought what she had to say was perfect for anyone out there who's ever felt like an outcast, or misunderstood, or whatever.

My sentiments, exactly!! Unique (and united) we stand!

Until next time,

Eddy

Food for Thought: Feelings Buried Alive Do Not Die

Hi Everyone,

In a couple of days we'll be saying goodbye to August and the summer of 2016. With more than half the year behind us, I've been thinking about my belief that this year was going to be an awesomely wonderful year for me, and how I've been let down. January went by without a hitch, but something strange happened to me in February that pretty much threw everything off course. Long story short, I've been in and out of physio and other treatments ever since, and I am so tired of it all. Mentally, physically, emotionally, financially... I am once again tapped out! ~ sigh ~

Anyway, I don't like to whine and complain about what's going on with me, but sometimes you just need to vent, know what I mean? You can't just keep pushing down your feelings and expect them to go away. So, with that in mind, I'm sharing a quote from Iyanla Vanzant, an inspirational speaker, teacher, life coach and the list goes on....

Iyanla has been through some very difficult times in her life, so she definitely speaks from experience. Plus, I think we can all agree that she's 100% right about not being able to heal if you refuse to acknowledge your feelings. What I admire is how she was able to turn all of the bad around into so much good for herself and for others.


Until next time,

Eddy

Food for Thought: Highway to Hell... Stairway to Heaven

Hey Everyone,

How goes it? I saw this quote the other day and thought it was pretty clever. The author is unknown, but you might recognize the songs being referenced.

An interesting interpretation that could spark a heated Heaven vs. Hell debate with some folks.


What do you guys think? Share your thoughts in the comments below.


Until next time,

Eddy

Food for Thought: The Greatest Heroes

Hi Everyone,

Today is Mother's Day and a fine day to share some food for thought! I know, it's been a while, huh? Well, this quote by relationship author Shannon L. Alder really captures what it means to be a mom.

May all you mom's out there have a most splendid Mother's Day!

Until next time,

Eddy

Food for Thought: Begin by Believing

Hello All,

Here we are, the last day of 2015. Looking back, it was a rough one for me -- mentally, physically, emotionally, financially.... Yep, a lot of stress on many levels, so I'm looking forward to 2016 with the belief that it's going to be an awesomely wonderful year for me. "Awesomely wonderful" -- yep, that's what I said! How about all of you out there? Well, here's some food for thought to help you on your way to thinking good thoughts and believing that 2016 can be awesomely wonderful for you too!

Happy New Year, everyone!

Until next time,

Eddy

Food for Thought: Bad Things That Happen

Hi All,

How's everyone doing? Have you all been making sure not to get caught up in other people's drama and "poor me" sagas by focusing on what you do have power over? Don't get me wrong. We all need to vent sometimes, but when you're constantly focused on the bad things in life, it's exhausting! Seriously, how do you feel after a conversation with someone like this? I feel like I've had the life sucked out of me, and I can only imagine what it must be like for that particular person to be in such a negative mindset all the time. So, this time around I'm offering up some food for thought about how the bad things in your life could actually be trying to guide you towards good things.

Now, you might be thinking that I'm talking crazy, but there goes another negative thought! Open yourself up to the possibility that bad things in your life are wake-up calls that will keep happening until you re-examine them and ask yourself what they're trying to teach you. If you could learn from the bad things that happen, then you could be on your way to more good in your life.

Until next time,

Eddy

Food for Thought: What You Do Have Power Over

Hello Everyone,

I can't believe that we're already one week into fall. If you're like me, you've been going and going, so I decided to slow us all down for a bit with some food for thought. This quote by Steve Maraboli (life-changing speaker & bestselling author) touches on a very important point that's come up a lot over the last year and a half in conversation with certain family members, but it's a tough one even for me. There are a lot of things in life that we simply have no control over. We might want to control them, and Heaven knows we've tried to control them, but we simply don't have the power. HOWEVER, there are also a lot of things in life that we do have control over! These are the things that we need to focus if we want to see results.

So, as a reminder to all of you and to myself, let's concern ourselves with what we do have power over, and the rest, well, we just have to let it go.

Until next time,

Eddy

Food for Thought: The Natural State of Motherhood

Hello Everyone,

Mother's Day is this weekend and it's been a while since I posted some food for thought, so I wanted to share a quote by award-winning actress Jessica Lange. I have no doubt that all you moms out there know exactly what she's talking about. I sure do!

My best wishes to moms everywhere. Have a wonderful and blessed Mother's Day surrounded by those you love and cherish.

Until next time,

Eddy

Food for Thought: Love is Friendship Caught Fire

Hello Everyone,

It's been a while since I posted some food for thought, so I figured something love related would be appropriate with Valentine's Day coming up this weekend. :) The first line of a poem by Laura Hendricks really grabbed me -- "Love is friendship caught fire" -- and, after reading the rest of it, I knew that I had to share the whole thing with all of you.

I think the poem really expresses what real love is -- how it's not sunshine and rainbows all the time. How many of you have the real thing? Leave a comment below.


Until next time,

Eddy