Will You Follow Me - iPod Shuffle Says...

Some time last year I came across this music meme that I thought would be fun to try out, but I ended up going on hiatus before I ever got around to it, so the meme was saved as a draft for me to work on later.


Well, now is definitely later, so let me first tell you guys how this meme works, and then I'll share my answers.


Rules:

1. Put your iPod, MP3 player, or whatever you listen to on shuffle
2. For each question, hit the next button to get your answer
3. You must write that song down, no matter how silly it sounds

Alright, now here's what happened when I sat down earlier this morning and pressed play...

1. If someone asks you "Are you okay?," you say:
"Mother's of the Disappeared" - U2
~ Hmm, not to make light of what this song is about, but there are days when I feel like I've been abducted by aliens.

2. How would you describe yourself?
"VCR" - The xx
~ I know myself, I'm comfortable with myself, I like to replay things over in my mind... um, okay, sure...

3. What do you like in a guy or girl?
"Little Feeling" - Leona Cassanova
~ More like little talking... (wink wink)

4. How do you feel today?
"Breathless" - Cat Power
~ I couldn't have said it any better myself.

5. What is your life's purpose?
"Be Here Now" - Ray Lamontagne
~ Whoa, that is so bang on.

6. What's your motto?
"Hand Covers Bruise" - Trent Rezner
~ Uh, nope... iPod shuffle fail.

7. What do your friends think of you?
"Who Will Comfort Me" - Melody Gardot
~ Hmm, maybe for a while after the whole HWSNBN and my Ex saga, but surely not now.

8. What do your parents think of you?
"Comme Une Fille" - Holden
~ Translation: Like a girl. OK, that is too weird. I guess I will always be their little girl.

9. What do you think of often?
"There's Only Me" - Rob Dougan
~ Uh, yeah!! lol OK, seriously, I'm not that self-centered.

10. What is 2 + 2?
"Hate" - Jay-Z, ft. Kanye West
~ So, 2-2 is love? I dunno...

11. What do you think of your best friend?
"Let Your Loss Be Your Lesson" - Robert Plant
~ Oh, Amen, Praise the Lord, Hallelujah! (you'd have to know the story behind this to fully understand)

12. What is your life story?
"Stand Up Comedy" - U2
~ Oh, iPod, you so funny. lol

13. What do you want to be when you grow up?
"Imagination Limitation" - Henrick Shawarz
~ Uh, translation, please. No, seriously. I think the song is in Swedish.

14. What do you think when you see the person you like?
"Worried Man" - Paolo Nutini
~ Oops, another iPod shuffle fail.

15. What will you dance to on your wedding's 4th anniversary?
"Blue Light" - Mazzy Star
~ Um, a little depressing for an anniversary.

16. What will they play at your funeral?
"A Call From the Vatican" - Penelope Cruz (Nine Soundtrack)
~ "Coochie coochie coochie coo..." Uh, I don't think so!!

17. What is your hobby or interest?
"Future Markets" - Jonny Greenwood
~ Yeah, I'm secretly preparing for when I finally leave the food industry behind to start working on Wall Street... NOT!

18. What is your biggest fear?
"L'Assassinat de Carala" - Miles Davis
~ Uh, more like my own assassination by one of my crazy customers!

19. What is your biggest secret?
"American Dreaming" - Dead Can Dance
~ OK, how did my iPod know I want to move to California?

20. What do you want right now?
"Distance and Time" - Alicia Keys
~ Oh, yes, please!!

21. What do you think of your friends?
"For Your Own Benefit" - Philip Glass
~ EW!! I think not! (this song is about satisfying needs, if you know what I mean)

22. When you're rushing to the toilet, what do you think?
"Never Change" - Jay-Z
~ More like gotta pee, gotta pee!

23. The person you hate the most is standing in front of you. What do you tell them?
"I Get Along Without You Very Well" - Chet Baker
~ Oh, h*ll, yeah!! iPod shuffle success!

24. You just won the lottery. What do you sing?
"The Money Train" - Nick Cave
~ Double h*ll, yeah! Woooo woooo!!

25. What will you post this meme as?
"Will You Follow Me" - Rob Dougan
~ Haha, yes! New blog followers are always welcome. :)

Stupid Customer Questions

Happy 2012, everybody!!

Did any of you make New Year's resolutions? I think most people do, but it's sticking to them that's the tricky part. We start out with good intentions, then life happens, and suddenly we're back into the same old routine again. Oh, well... :)

So, in my last post I mentioned that I was going to put together a list of stupid questions that customers dared to ask me during the holidays. There were a whole bunch of them, but I'm only going to list ten and ask that you promise never to ask your local Bakery clerk these questions, ever.


1. Do you sell bread?

~ Are you f-ing making fun of me? This is the Bakery department. WTF do you think we sell, soap??!!

2. Did you bake today?

~ Again, are you f-ing making fun of me??!!

3. Do you have a cake counter?

~ Considering that you are standing right in front of it, yes, moron!!!

4. Is your fresh bread hot?

~ Yes, somehow it stays nice and hot all day long. Uh, no, stupid!!

5. Will you be baking hot bread on Christmas Day?

~ Oh, yes, just for you. NOT!!!!! We will be eating Christmas dinner with our families while you stand outside like the stupid idiot that you are waiting for God knows what!!

6. Do you slice baguettes?

~ FOR THE MILLIONTH BLOODY TIME, NOOOOOOO!!!! BUY A KNIFE, DAMN IT!!!

7. What time do you open on New Years Day?

~ OMG, seriously?? HAHAHAHA??? WTF is wrong with you??!!!

8. Can I have 200 grams of ham?

~ Sure, and would you like a cheesecake to go with that?? Wrong department, dumba**!!

9. Do you sell wedding cakes?

~ Look, I know Christmas time is stressful, but you really need to stop sniffing pine scented Glade so you can think straight. I mean, for the love of God, does it look like we make wedding cakes??

10. Where can I find sliced bread?

~ Really?? Seriously, really?? LenseCrafters, idiot!! GET SOME GLASSES!!


- JB